ADHD: A call for change on International Women's Day
In recent years, awareness of ADHD has grown significantly, yet misconceptions and a lack of support persist. As a woman diagnosed with ADHD later in life, I find that conversations about ADHD—whether my own journey or that of others—are now a daily occurrence. Despite this growing recognition, ADHD remains widely misunderstood, particularly in women, and our work and education systems continue to fall short in providing the necessary support. Councils across the UK are facing significant deficits in special educational needs and disabilities (SEND) funding schools, with some predicting debts exceeding £100 million. This financial strain threatens the provision of adequate support for students with ADHD and other neurodiverse conditions, leaving many without the resources they need to thrive. Meanwhile, in the workplace, individuals with ADHD often encounter challenges due to a lack of understanding and accommodations.
David Tony Lloyd, chief executive of the ADHD Foundation, highlights that there has been a staggering 400% increase in the number of adults seeking an ADHD diagnosis since 2020. More than half of these individuals have been adult women, many of whom have previously been treated for anxiety, depression, OCD, and eating disorders, conditions commonly associated with undiagnosed ADHD.
From childhood, girls are conditioned to aspire to fairy-tale ideals—dressed in pretty clothes, given role-play toys, and encouraged to dream of a perfect future filled with marriage, children, and a beautiful home. As they grow into adolescence, the pressure only intensifies. They are expected to excel academically, build successful careers, and maintain a polished appearance—all while navigating complex social dynamics. However, for those with ADHD, these expectations can be overwhelming. Many struggle to form and sustain friendships, often exacerbated by Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), and find it difficult to keep up with the relentless demands of school, work, and social life.
Dr. Rowena Christmas, chair of the Royal College of General Practitioners in Wales, explains that girls with ADHD frequently mask their symptoms to fit societal expectations. While their minds may be just as distractable as boys who present with more overt hyperactivity, they tend to sit quietly, internalising their struggles. Over time, this masking can result in a lifetime of feeling different, struggling in relationships, and experiencing difficulties in daily life.
Yet, as we strive to meet these societal ideals, many of us begin to feel the weight of unfulfilled expectations. Anxiety and depression creep in, revealing the cracks in the illusion of the perfect life we were led to believe would bring happiness. Instead, we feel overwhelmed, like failures, unable to cope with daily life, yet we don’t understand why. Many women with ADHD face challenges such as divorce, career breakdowns, and addiction, often labeled as "problems" rather than individuals navigating a difficult path.
More and more women are waking up to the realisation that they don’t have to conform to outdated societal molds. Burnout, trauma, and exhaustion are pushing us to break free from these unrealistic expectations. Many of us feel more like Cinderella, overburdened by responsibilities and the relentless noise of work, partners, children, and family than the princesses we were promised we would become. But we are discovering something powerful: we are not meant to be confined by these roles. Instead, we are free spirits, more like modern heroines such as Moana and Elsa, forging our own paths, and that is more than okay.
This International Women’s Day, let’s embrace our authentic selves and challenge societal expectations. By stepping into our power, we can become the role models young girls need—showing them they don’t have to fit into predefined molds. Together, we can empower the next generation to define their own paths, pursue their passions, and embrace their uniqueness, creating a world where every girl feels free to be who she truly is—without fear of judgment or limitation.